The Hospital: Never Again

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Never Again Is Now Global — A Five-Part Series by Vera Sharav

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The Hospital

June 27th – July 19th, 2021

Sunday, June 27, 8:30 p.m.

The Hospital

Sunday evening, I felt drained and tired but had no fever. It had been two weeks of being sick, with mid-range fevers, congestion, and fatigue. Maria called an ambulance and insisted I go to the hospital. I wanted to wait till Monday, but everyone seemed concerned that I go right away even though I was in no pain and was not short of breath; I just kept having fits of coughing. There was a question about where I would go – CIMA or the state hospital. My feeling was that going to a private hospital would be better. Maria said it was less crowded – I told her I would go to the less crowded one. My son Daniel (who was also very sick but recovering) heard me say that. Instead, Maria told the ambulance driver to take me to the state hospital.

Emergency Room

The ambulance ride was long and I was hooked up to oxygen as we traveled to the hospital. No one talked to me as I watched the flickering car headlights and passing streetlights reflected on the ambulance ceiling, unsure about what would happen to me. The attendant in the ambulance had a thick pad of forms he was filling out. But I noticed he would write, stop, then look out the window, and never finish the form. He had a very distracted dazed look in his eyes. We arrived at the emergency entrance, and I saw we were in central San Jose, but I was unsure exactly where. I clutched my travel pouch with my important papers, credit cards, phone, and charging cable. As I was wheeled through the double doors I first saw that the walls were painted a dark green, and the light was dim. An obese woman was lying on her stomach on a hospital bed. The nurses were cracking jokes. All the female nurses were very young and acted silly, posing for each other and teasing each other. So, I found the place odd before I was given any medicine or injection. Why were all of these people joking around when sick people were there? In the past, I have been in emergency rooms in the U.S., usually with bright, white walls and solemn, filled with quiet ill people, so I found everything here strange.

After moving me to a hospital bed from the ambulance gurney, an English-speaking nurse asked to give me a PCR test. I questioned her about it; I wondered if there was another way to test if I had COVID – she said no – this was the only way they did it at this hospital. She said they would not treat me if I did not take the test. So, I decided to have it done, remembering that my son had been tested this way and had not been harmed by it.

When the nurse stuck the swab far up my right nostril, it was very uncomfortable. I cringed a bit. Then she stuck a swab far up my left nostril, I flinched back and uttered, ¨What the hell! ¨ I saw a flash and a small sepia-colored microchip shape with this label [#13].

Next, a nurse came with various shaped vials and large syringes and drew blood from my left arm. That arm has the best veins. Another nurse walked up with two large needles and said they needed to take arterial blood samples. First, she took a sample from my left wrist. Another nurse held my arm still – it felt like something was being injected into my wrist rather than drawn out. I was shocked at how badly this procedure hurt. The nurse came around the hospital bed to take a sample from my right wrist. She tried it without the other nurse holding my arm. Again, the pain was intense. But she had to try again because she missed the vein, and it felt like something was injected into my wrist rather than drawn out.

They wheeled my bed into a dark side room, and I dozed off for a short time. After about 30 minutes, a male nurse walked into the room, a female nurse stood solemnly next to him, and without looking directly at me, he stated in a very flat voice that I tested positive for COVID. They then turned and walked out. A few minutes later, the same male nurse returned and said he needed to take all my clothing and someone from my home would have to pick it up. A female nurse helped me undress and put on a faded pink hospital gown. She then put my clothing into a black plastic trash bag. A few minutes later, the male nurse returned and said he needed to take my papers and phone – everything – due to some new magisterial order! I reacted strongly against this because I would be left in this hospital without identification; I did not trust giving anyone my personal belongings – especially my phone. But the male nurse proceeded to tug the things out of my hand and put everything in the bag with my clothes. A few minutes later, a female nurse came in with a form with my name and ID printed and asked who they should contact to pick up my belongings – she emphasized that these things had to be picked up immediately. I told her to call Maria and Carlos, whom I knew had their car and knew where I was. Their number was already listed as a contact because Maria was the one who had called the ambulance. I asked what time it was, and the nurse said around 10:30 pm. I also asked where I was, and she said The Hospital. I was then wheeled into a larger room where there were other patients – I could not see anyone well because my bed was in a flat position, and I dozed off, worried about what I had gotten myself into.

The Hospital: Day One

Monday, June 28

It was dawn when I was transported to the main hospital. After a short ride to the hospital, A nurse wheeled my bed through hallways and to the COVID treatment area, accessed only through a special elevator with a large red emergency warning sign looming over the door. The nurse had to type in a code to open the elevator door. I saw this and felt uneasy. It seemed like I was entering a prison.

The patient rooms had various names; the one I was placed in was named Salon Tara (I found this out weeks later). These rooms held six patient beds, attached to a bank of attachments with computerized monitors that recorded and displayed the patient’s vital statistics. There was a separate bathroom and shower area. The main sliding glass doors were kept shut. Doctors never entered; only nurses and cleaning personnel completely covered in PPE. The far wall from my bed (no. 96) to the left consisted of a large bank of windows. The windows overlooked building roofs, and two large towers were visible in the distance. I tried to figure out what direction I was looking at, and it appeared to be southwest.

*Note: all conversations were in Spanish unless noted with ENG. I understand more Spanish than I can speak, but the nurses and doctors did not know this. My comprehension of Spanish was vital because I was not exposed to the program’s full impact, and the doctors and nurses would say things thinking I did not understand. I understood more than half of what was said in Spanish.

Because no doctors or nurses wore visible name badges and constantly wore masks, it was hard to remember the names of various nurses or doctors.

General Schedule:

4:30 a.m.    Morning nurses came to clean patients and change the bedding.

                  Male attendants came to empty the trash and biohazard containers.

                  Blood pressure check/medicine/anticoagulant shot

5:30 a.m.     coffee and bread

                      Morning nurse/doctor rounds

10:45 a.m.   breakfast: pinto de gallo, bread, cheese, pineapple or banana, water

1:15 p.m.     lunch: chicken, rice, salad, papaya, vegetables, water

4:30 p.m.     dinner: meat/fish, rice, beans, bread, salad, tomato, lettuce, water

                     Blood pressure check/medicine/anticoagulant shot

8:00 p.m.   Warm drink, atole.

                     Night nurse/doctor rounds

                     Night medications.

Atole, sometimes referred to as atolli or atol de elote in other Latin countries, is a warm drink that is traditionally served in Mexico.

Standard recipes call for a mix of corn flour, corn dough, water, and spices. Milk is often incorporated into this set of ingredients to add sweetness and moisture. 

There was a variety of good fresh food. The times are approximate because there was no clock visible from my position. Later I would find out that the date and time were displayed very small on the lower right side of the patient monitor. I could not see the small time displayed well because I did not have my eyeglasses with me

I learned the names of the other patients on the first day. I noticed that all patients had their phones and bags of personal belongings. I was the only one without a phone and personal belongings, and the nurses were not clear about my placing a phone call. They were very unhelpful. I kept asking to call my son and tried to figure out how to contact him once I got access to a phone. I did not have the number memorized, and since I did not have any of my papers, I had no phone numbers memorized. But I remembered the restaurant owned by Alex, the son of Maria and Carlos. Even though it was Monday and the restaurant was closed, Rosita offered to call it after looking it up on Facebook. We rang several times, and finally, Lara’s sister Elizabeth answered! Bingo! We got through, and Rosita gave Elizabeth the telephone number to have my son contact me. I felt better knowing that someone on the outside knew where I was.

Nurses came in with patient medicines and syringes. A nurse grabbed my left arm to give me a shot; I pulled away and asked what it was. She got pissed off and began sounding off at me in Spanish as she gave all the other patients a shot. Then she asked me if I still did not want it – I said ¨No, I don’t want it.¨ I thought her attitude was ridiculous. Leo and I talked about it – how unreasonable she was. Later, we asked another nurse what the shot was, and I found out it was an anticoagulant – Heparina – Leo and I looked it up on his phone, and I read that it was ok. So, I got the afternoon injection.


Bed No. 97: Leo. He is married with two sons. He was ill but could talk on his phone ok. He volunteered for a research study on a floor below where we were. A research study paper was put on my tray table instead of his by mistake, and I read it before I realized what it was. Later, I saw an American doctor come in to talk to him. By Thursday morning, he was transferred out and replaced by an older woman.

Bed No. 95: Tina. She was about 50 years old and, during the day, was always in a very sour mood. At first, she was very sick. She slept most of the day and was not breathing well. Her phone lost its charge, and she did not have the proper cable, so Rosita let her use her phone to call home, and she would go on a loud rant about how COVID was the way to get people from doing their evil deeds. She would tell her father to stop drinking and doing nasty things when she spoke to him on the telephone.

Bed No. 98: Aglia was very sick and slept on her side or stomach for the first two days. She did not talk very much to any patients. She would speak with her family on her phone all the time.

Bed No. 99: Jose was very ill; he could barely breathe, he did not eat, he did not talk, he just laid on his back and slept the whole time. Jose was transferred out by Tuesday.

Bed No. 100: Rosita was still coughing a bit but was getting better. She said she had been there for 21 days. Rosita spent her days talking to her large family on her phone. She offered me the use of her phone to call home.

The First Night: The nighttime was very different from the daytime. I was hooked to a large cannula and an oxygen machine because my oxygen level was around 83. Around 8:30 p.m., the nurses gave us medicine and a cup of water. I asked what each pill was. The first night I got a vitamin C, two large white pills for digestion, and a tablet in a blister pack for circulation/oxygen. I began to hear Rosita’s monitor above her bed making a musical-sounding chime. The little light at the top would light up and off. Rosita herself was fast asleep on her side. I thought this was very strange. We were all hooked up to our monitors by a finger pulse monitor. These were special because they also kept track of our oxygen saturation level, which showed up on the monitors above our beds. A beeping alarm would sound if the monitor fell off your finger or if you took it off. So, how and why was Rosita’s monitor making a very relaxing musical chime? I listened and gradually fell asleep.

I began to fall asleep and felt a ¨glitch¨ (The only way to describe it – I felt my body twitch, my heart jumped a beat, and I was over and into what I will call a program.) First, I was walking in the hospital, and fantastic machines ran the whole building in the basement under the emergency Covid section. Down a dark hallway, I saw the machines replicating themselves by using women as surrogates for creating human/machine beings. I saw a pregnant woman screaming as a machine sliced her open to reveal a strange round armadillo-shaped mechanical ¨baby¨. Some human nurses nearby marveled at it, and I left quickly down another hallway and then saw a flash of a document in a sepia tone. It looked like a patent document. On it was the Title DOD Department of Defense, bar code, and patent number – similar to this example:

There was a list of subscriptions in numerical order that one could choose. I just accepted the first one, which led me to a night-long exhaustive creation of my own company. I designed the logo, the name – Supreme Drone Delivery – and the whole business model. I was delighted and excited; it was a total rush. I could not wait to tell Daniel all about it. I woke up near dawn, drenched in sweat, my heart racing, and I felt as if I was surfacing from deep underwater. Several monitors were beeping what sounded like a repetitive sentence: ¨You cannot save us. ¨ ¨No, you can’t ¨ This was coming from monitors no.98 and no.99. I thought, what the hell was in that medicine? I recognized everything I had just undergone as some drug-induced hallucination.

I awoke to a dawning recognition of strange things about several patients and nurses’ behavior. I feel now, in retrospect, that the first night’s medication began my trip into the program that was being run. Before the first night’s pills, I did not hear chimes and beeps from patient monitors, I did not hear people talking strangely, and I did not see people acting weird.

English: 6/28/21, 9:20 a.m. – Messages and calls are end-to-end encrypted. No one outside of this chat, not even WhatsApp, can read or listen to them. Tap to learn more.

6/28/21, 9:20 a.m. – Daniel: Good morning Maria, how are you? I hope you’re well. I wanted to tell you that a bag of my mother’s things was at my door this morning. The things were her clothes, document holder, telephone and charger. Now that she doesn’t have a phone, we have to wait longer for information.

6/28/21, 10:14 a.m. – Maria: Yes Carlos and I went to the hospital last night and I picked up that bag, we have the documents on hand and he put alcohol on them. Wash clothes with plenty of soap. I went to the Covi emergency center at the hospital downtown. I spoke to dr. that she is with her and she told me that she was responding well to oxygen.

6/28/21, 10:14 a.m. – Maria: Mr. Ramos will bring you cooked food.

6/28/21, 10:19 a.m. – Daniel: Ok, I understand. Thank you very much for your help, Maria. God bless you.

6/28/21, 10:29 a.m. – Maria: Yesterday I realized how much I love your mommy. I have a hospital phone number, I am trying to communicate and if I know something I will tell you. 6/28/21, 10:30 a.m. – Daniel: Thanks for the kind words Maria. Ok, thanks again.

6/28/21, 10:37 a.m. – Maria: Daniel. How do you feel?

6/28/21, 10:38 a.m. – Daniel: I feel good. I have no fever or pain

6/28/21, 10:45 a.m. – Maria: Good. You shouldn’t go outside for 2 weeks. If you can, take the boxes that are around the table out on the terrace. You should put liquid Lizol on the surfaces. and spray the whole house. Open window doors, if you can little by little and remove all of mom’s bedding and take the mattress out to the balcony to ventilate. I would like to help you but it is dangerous for me I am high risk. Anything you need, let me know with confidence.ok😉 ♥ ️👍🏽

6/28/21, 10:50 a.m. – Daniel: Ok, I understand. Without worries. I’ll start disinfection today as you described .👍🏽

6/28/21, 1:33 p.m. – Daniel: Ok, thank you very much

6/28/21, 6:14 p.m. – Maria: Hi Daniel, how are you feeling?

6/28/21, 6:16 p.m. – Daniel: Hi Maria, I feel good. How was the visit to my mother?

 6/28/21, 6:20 p.m. – Maria: I couldn’t see her. But I was reassured to know that she is in a room where the condition is average, I am waiting for the doctor in charge of her to call me.

6/28/21, 6:22 p.m. – Daniel: Ok, thank you very much for this news.

6/28/21, 6:31 p.m. – Maria: I recently spoke with Dr. and she says your mother did not allow them to put the heparin in her. Heparin is an anticoagulant that is generally applied to the stomach when lying down for a long time to avoid forming blood clots. These patients are isolated and do not allow any communication.

6/28/21, 6:32 p.m. – Maria: You can look it up on the internet.

6/28/21, 6:37 p.m. – Daniel: Ok, I know what this drug is. Thanks for the update.

 6/28/21, 6:39 p.m. – Maria: It worries me, also this disease gives thrombi (clots) and heparin does not allow this to happen.

6/28/21, 6:40 p.m. – Daniel: Do we know the results of the covid test for my mother?

6/28/21, 6:44 p.m. – Maria: If she has covid. And by nexus you too. Since I was close to her last Wednesday, I must be at my house and let no one come because I too can have covid.

6/28/21, 6:45 p.m. – Maria: Do you know where you got it?

6/28/21, 6:47 p.m. – Maria: You guys went to San Lorenzo last week.

6/28/21, 6:51 p.m. – Daniel: I started feeling bad on Monday, June 14. I was with Nico just to run an errand and then back to my house. I’ve been at my house all this time. We canceled the trip to Heredia and never went. I would be surprised if it was covid.

6/28/21, 6:54 p.m. – Maria: Renee went somewhere to get it.?

6/28/21, 6:57 p.m. – Maria: I was with Renee on June 16 in the afternoon, who got sick first. 6/28/21, 6:59 p.m. – Daniel: Right, I was sick on the 16th, not my mother. My mother was mainly here in the house between June 14 and June 27. She got sick from me after a week of being sick. We were not traveling because it rained a lot these 2 weeks.

6/28/21, 7:02 p.m. – Maria: She went to the dentist and to the supermarket?

6/28/21, 7:05 p.m. – Daniel: No dentist. I do not remember the market. What I’m saying is that she’s more likely to have gotten sick from me than from any of these other places in the last 2 weeks. I was sick a week before she started to feel bad.

 6/28/21, 7:11 p.m. – Maria: Most likely. Now ask God that she does not complicate in the next few days.

6/28/21, 7:14 p.m. – Maria: I explained to you last night but I don’t think you understood me that it was better to go to CIMA even though it is very expensive.

6/28/21, 7:14 p.m. – Maria: But cheaper than USA.

 6/28/21, 7:26 p.m. – Daniel: Is my mother at CIMA?

6/28/21, 7:28 p.m. – Maria: No, she is in The Hospital, I already told you, in bed # 96.

6/28/21, 7:31 p.m. – Daniel: ok, I understand. We will continue to pray for her health. Thank you and have a good night Maria.

The Hospital: Day Two

Tuesday, June 29

It was Tuesday around noon when I got to talk to Daniel. I made sure to memorize his phone number. I was talking on Rosita’s phone, and a doctor arrived at the door with an entourage of nurses. He demanded (by shouting into the room from the door in ENG) to get off the phone! I kept talking while looking at him, I think I said something about getting off to Daniel, but I did not hang up immediately because I was astounded at the doctor’s behavior. He kept yelling to get off the phone, or he would have to intubate me! I asked, ¨are you threatening me?¨ He said my oxygen levels were deficient, so I could not be talking on the phone! He was literally stamping his foot in a fury! Now, think back to what I already wrote — I was surrounded by people talking on their phones whenever they wanted, and some were in worse condition than I was! This incident added to my misgivings about the hospital. I had never been treated this way.

I told Daniel that I wanted to get out of this hospital and go to CIMA — that this place was strange.

I spent the day sleeping and sometimes talking with the other patients. Jose was not recovering, and they transferred him out. Another man (I will call him Zappo because he looked like a frog) was admitted. This man constantly talked like he was on speed. I could not understand much of what he said, but he kept talking to everyone. I noticed he did not wear a mask and was not connected to oxygen. He walked freely around the room. He appeared not to be sick. I never heard him cough. I immediately felt a distrust of him. I openly asked him in Spanish what he was doing here since he appeared not to be sick, but he did not answer.

The nurses turned on the large TV in the evening, and I tried to sleep, but Zappo kept talking all evening. The nurse had given Zappo the remote, and he wanted to watch the news and violent novellas all night. So, about 10:00 p.m. — the nurses had turned off the room lights, and most everyone else was asleep — I asked Zappo to turn off the TV. He said no. So, I began to take my finger pulse monitor on and off so that the alarm would get a nurse into the room. This Zappo guy walked over to my bed and said I should stop doing that, or they would think we were having sex! I knew he was strange, and I became a bit afraid. I realized how vulnerable I was. I knew I had to talk to the doctors about this situation. How was I going to recover when I could not get good rest? Why would they have a man who was not sick walking around the room? How could they have a TV on all night in a room of COVID patients? Nothing was making sense.

On this night, when the nurses finally did come in and turn off the TV, I ¨glitched¨ again and fell into the next subscription titled the No.No. House. In this scenario, you chose your weapon and the house’s configuration, and you had to evade some soldiers and try to kill them in return. I just wanted to sleep, but instead, I woke myself up. I saw that everyone was asleep except me. I noticed that the monitors for beds no.98 and no.99 were working overtime, making beeps and clicks, and the lights on top were flickering in tandem with Tina’s monitor next to me. She was making moans and noises like she was having sex. Again, I was like — what the hell is this? The other monitors seemed to be doing things to Tina through her monitor.

I fell asleep and, in the morning, awoke in a complete sweat again.

Sequence Detail: Patient Monitors

8:00 p.m. Nurses dispense night medicine. Patients begin to get sleepy. 8:30 p.m.: Patient Monitor №100 begins a melodic relaxing chiming with the light at the top flickering in tandem. Everyone drifts off to sleep.

After approximately 20 minutes, a countdown chime starts for about 30 minutes. Then there are answering beeps and clicks with the patient Monitors №98 and 99. My impression is that they were communicating with each other and linking up. The monitors all link up with patient Monitor №95, and after a few minutes, the patient in that bed responds with moaning and groaning. The patients in beds №98, №99, and №97 begin making grunts, groans, and mumbling yes, nice — all very sexual. №96 — my bed is not communicating with the other monitors with beeps and clicks (because I am awake?); however, when I take off the finger pulse monitor and unattached myself, it disrupts the link between all of the monitors. I discovered this days later. There is also another particular aspect of patient monitors. When the sequence is over, they make beeps that sound like words. At first, I thought they sounded like ¨You Cannot Save Us. ¨ But, by the second night, I was sure the words were ¨You Cannot Stop Us. ¨ ¨No, You Can’t ¨. The sequence repeats itself eight times during the night — with each sequence lasting about an hour. It all stops by 4:30 a.m. (8 hours later) when the morning nurses clean the patients and their beds to begin the day.

I will explain; I knew when I was asleep and seeing things in some program and when I was awake and seeing things in reality. I could tell the difference. What I saw when I woke up was real, and I tested it by talking the next day with Leo and Rosita. They both complained about the constant chiming of the monitors for no apparent reason. Neither one remembered though anything from when they slept.


Messages and calls are end-to-end encrypted. No one outside of this chat, not even WhatsApp, can read or listen to them. Tap to learn more.

6/29/21, 7:27 a.m. — Maria: Hi Daniel. Good Morning. Talk to the nurse and make an appointment for the Dr. to call me and also give her phone # in case they call you, her name is Dr. Rico. I do not know if the Dra speaks English and I suggested that it better to me and then tell you by Whatsapp and you pass it by English. She doesn’t want to inject any medicine. And that is very dangerous, you can even die.

6/29/21, 7:29 a.m. — Maria: They told me that she is very delicate.

6/29/21, 7:48 a.m. — Maria: She wants to go to Cima Hospital, please answer me.

6/29/21, 7:27 a.m. — Maria: Missed voice call

6/29/21, 7:44 a.m. — Maria: Missed voice call

6/29/21, 7:46 a.m. — Maria: Missed voice call

6/29/21, 8:01 AM — D: Hi Maria

6/29/21, 8:04 a.m. — Maria: Please translate what I wrote you into English and answer me. 6/29/21, 8:08 a.m. — D: Ok, I understand that I need to speak to the nurse. And that my mother wants to go to CIMA.

6/29/21, 8:11 a.m. — Maria: It’s very important. You can call CIMA to take care of the transfer and give the card #.

6/29/21, 8:20 a.m. — Maria: Answer.

6/29/21, 8:34 a.m. — Maria: Daniel already contacted the ambulance for the transfer to the CIMA hospital. CIMA # XXXX-XXXX.

6/29/21, 8:35 a.m. — Maria: I can help you with this but I need authorization to use a card. Answer please.

6/29/21, 8:36 a.m. — D: Ok, thanks Maria, you have my authorization. What card do you need? 6/29/21, 8:38 a.m. — Maria: The one on credit to pay for the ambulance to transport your mother

6/29/21, 8:39 a.m. — D: Ok, here’s the card number:

6/29/21, 8:41 a.m. — Maria: Will you have enough funds to pay?

6/29/21, 8:42 a.m. — D: Yes

6/29/21, 8:42 a.m. — D: I give you full authorization for you to use this card to move Mom. 6/29/21, 8:47 a.m. — Maria: Daniel, Alex my son is going to be the laps because I can’t go out, he is trustworthy.

6/29/21, 8:49 a.m. — D: Ok, thanks Maria

6/29/21, 8:50 a.m. — Maria: Can you give the card to Alex?

6/29/21, 9:22 a.m. — Maria: Missed voice call

6/29/21, 9:28 a.m. — D: Yes I understand

6/29/21, 9:28 a.m. — Maria: Before I call you on the phone and you don’t answer.

6/29/21, 9:29 a.m. — Maria: She does not accept medication and if she continues like this, the worst is likely to happen.

6/29/21, 9:30 a.m. — D: I was sitting here with the phone after using the bathroom.

6/29/21, 9:30 a.m. — Maria: Be aware that Dr. is going to call you.

6/29/21, 9:30 a.m. — D: I understand. I will talk to the doctor

6/29/21, 9:31 AM — Maria: Dr. Rico.

6/29/21, 9:31 a.m. — D: ok perfect

6/29/21, 9:40 a.m. — Maria: Daniel please be reasonable. She was examined and if she has covid, not the isolate but blood.

6/29/21, 9:45 a.m. — D: Ok of course. We’ll see what the doctor says. Thanks.

6/29/21, 10:46 a.m. — Maria: Tell me when I call you Please.

6/29/21, 10:49 AM — D: Okay, no problem

6/29/21, 12:04 p.m. — Maria: Have you been able to talk to your mom?

6/29/21, 12:08 p.m. — Maria: Just so you know the card was not used.

6/29/21, 12:09 p.m. — D: Yes, I just spoke to her. I’m still waiting for the doctor to call me. 6/29/21, 12:10 p.m. — Maria: What does she say?

6/29/21, 12:16 p.m. — D: My mother says she wants to leave the hospital. I told her that I am working with the doctor to try to make this happen. We are at the mercy of this doctor at this time.

6/29/21, 12:18 p.m. — Maria: No, I already tried, but by protocol they can’t let her out. What she has is to let herself be given the medications.

6/29/21, 12:23 p.m. — D: I understand the situation. I’m looking forward to speaking with the doctor so we can move on.

6/29/21, 12:32 p.m. — Maria: Your mom is in a 6 person cubicle and the phone there is xxxx-xxxx bed # 96

6/29/21, 12:37 p.m. — D: Ok, thanks Maria. I told the nurse that I needed the doctor to call me. So we are waiting for this call.

6/29/21, 2:51 p.m. — Maria: I think you have to call very early like 7 a.m. and it’s easier.

6/29/21, 2:53 p.m. — D: Yes I agree. I hope I have better luck tomorrow morning.

6/29/21, 4:02 p.m. — Maria: This message was deleted

6/29/21, 6:01 p.m. — Maria: Daniel Hi. I just called a Mr. Baron from The Hospital and tomorrow in the course of the day I imagine tomorrow morning to be ready a video call will be made. between you me and the medical corps. it is good and the American Embassy is acting. I like that.

6/29/21, 6:02 p.m. — Maria: It occurs to me that with the attorneys you have, you can help too. 6/29/21, 6:03 p.m. — D: Yes, I just spoke to the man now. We should get some answers tomorrow.

6/29/21, 6:13 p.m. — Maria: Yes, she is very delicate.

6/29/21, 6:18 p.m. — D: She is very strong, I believe in her strength

6/29/21, 6:18 p.m. — Maria: Yes, God first.

6/29/21, 6:20 p.m. — D: 🙏🏽

The Hospital: Day Three

Wednesday, June 30

I called this day the breakthrough day.

In the morning, I talked to the 4:30 a.m. nurses. One was very nice. I gave him Daniel’s phone number and asked him to call to tell him I was ok and let him know my bed number. I tried to make friends and get the word out to as many people as possible.

I was able to have a video call with Daniel in the afternoon. The hospital has a computer tablet to do this! (Question: Why was I not offered this before?) I relayed to him that I wanted to go to CIMA. I tell him that the care here is terrible. I tried to hint to him that other things were going on by speaking in code because the nurses were listening carefully. I mention the book One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.

I spoke to Dr. Rico (sp? ENG), who came into the salon, and I discussed the problem with Zappo. I told her I could not sleep until late because of Zappo talking and the TV. I asked her how a man who did not appear to be sick could be in this room, walking around. Dr. Rico seemed scared and nervous throughout the whole conversation. She kept looking towards the door and began picking at her latex glove until she tore a hole in it. A piece of blue latex snapped off, and I felt a drop of her sweat land on my face. She seemed unaware of doing it. I began to sense that there might be even more problems than just weird patients who talked all day and night and chimes from monitors. Here was a doctor that was clearly under some strain.

This day was also the day I became aware of a particular phenomenon. I would hear people talking in English or Spanish, and they would be saying impossible things. If I said anything about it to them, they would deny it. These were auditory hallucinations that seemed entirely real but improbable because people were saying things they could not possibly know. In addition, the things they said were childish and mean. It was like listening to little children taunting someone – in this case – me. For example, I overheard Zappo telling Rosita that she should not let me use her phone because she might get in trouble. On this day, Zappo was acting manic; he talked nonstop the whole day and into the evening

In the evening, I thought of others in the past and present that were in similar situations; cut off from friends and family, imprisoned, and possibly tortured. I thought of Julian Assange. I thought of Nelson Mandela. I thought of Sitting Bull. I decided I needed to be more on the offensive and protect myself. They said I could not have anything from outside the hospital, so I took the paper masks they gave us daily and began making something to help me keep track of the time and events. I used memory knots. They would not let me have a pen or paper, so I got creative. I tied this to my arm so I would not lose it.

I overheard Aglia talking about me badly at night before she went to sleep. It was strange; she was lying in bed talking on her phone; I could see the glow of her phone on her face as she was facing my direction, saying things like, ¨Who does this, Renee think she is, buying a house, having chickens? ¨ENG. I told her to shut up and go to sleep. How did she know I was buying a house? I might have mentioned that I had chickens, but why did she seem to be taunting me?

That night, I had decided not to take Florodon (sp?) medicine.

It is not listed on the drugs I was given. I read the back of the blister pack and heard the nurses say the name. I realized that Florodon was the medication that put me to sleep and made me ¨glitch¨ into the program. I spit the pill out into my cup of water when the nurse was not looking. In addition, to combat the drowsiness and the sweating, I realized that if I took a piece of paper towel dipped in my cup of water and dabbed it on my forehead and face, I felt cooler and more awake. I stayed up all night without taking the drug and witnessed what happened when everyone went to sleep.

This was the breakthrough, I now had a better idea of what I was in the middle of, and I realized I had to get out.

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6/30/21, 7:13 a.m. – Maria: Good morning, I’m ready for the video call you’re going to make to us. You are already well, please. Your phone is always at your side. Take care I love you. Let’s move on, all this will pass.

6/30/21, 7:18 a.m. – D: Good morning Maria, Yes, I am ready for the video call. I am waiting at the phone for the call. I hope we get answers to all of our questions.

6/30/21, 7:19 a.m. – Maria: Yes, all the best for Renee, let’s try to see if we can pass her on to CIMA.

6/30/21, 7:21 a.m. – D: I agree

6/30/21, 7:55 a.m. – Maria: #XXXXXXX you call and say you are waiting for the video call. First you say good morning very kind, it’s a technique. Put a message for your mom to let her take the medications and that she has covid on Rosita’s phone, put it first for Renee. Ok

6/30/21, 7:56 a.m. – Maria: For bed 96.

6/30/21, 8:00 a.m. – D: Hi Maria, is this the phone number for the video call? I am confused by what you ask me.

6/30/21, 8:03 a.m. – Maria: This # is from the cubicle where your mom is and you can say that you are ready to receive the video call from the bed patient 96.

6/30/21, 8:05 a.m. – Maria: Renee’s neighbor’s phone called Rosita is #XXXXXXX to leave a message for your mother in English ok

6/30/21, 8:07 a.m. – D: ok, I understand. I’ll call now thanks.

6/30/21, 8:11 AM – Maria: 👍🏽😉 ♥ ️

6/30/21, 8:12 a.m. – Maria: Leave a message to Renee on Rosita’s phone.

6/30/21, 8:13 a.m. – D: I left the message with Rosita. I’m not sure when the video call will be, she didn’t say. So now we wait.

6/30/21, 8:16 a.m. – Maria: The message is for Renee written on Rosita’s phone, she is Renee’s companion at the hospital, tell her in the message that she has covid and let her put the medicines, what she wants, doubts, tell me.

6/30/21, 8:19 a.m. – D: Is Rosita Renee’s nurse at the hospital or is Rosita a patient at the hospital?

6/30/21, 8:19 a.m. – Maria: IS A patient of the .

6/30/21, 8:20 a.m. – Maria: Hospital and lends her the phone. To your mom.

6/30/21, 8:23 a.m. – D: ok, I understand

6/30/21, 8:27 a.m. – Maria: Daniel, very good news, Renee lets herself be on her medications and eats everything, we’re going very well.😁😉😘 ♥ ️👍🏽

6/30/21, 8:29 a.m. – D: Sounds great Maria 👍🏼🙏🏽

6/30/21, 8:38 a.m. – Maria: If that’s what we needed.

6/30/21, 10:25 a.m. – Maria: Hi Daniel. Dr. Rico and Dr. Leonardo came to your mother and she called me. Your mother raised the saturation to 90% because she did not allow medications but she is already leaving it and she is very sure that it will improve. They do not allow a cell phone. Communication is through Rosita’s phone. I already gave you the phone.


6/30/21, 10:28 a.m. – D: I understand

6/30/21, 10:33 a.m. – Maria: Please answer

6/30/21, 10:34 a.m. – Maria: The video call is here, I answered

6/30/21, 10:34 a.m. – Maria: Missed video call

6/30/21, 10:59 a.m. – Maria: Daniel at this moment she cannot be transferred to Cima because his saturation is 90% and it is very dangerous for her. We must wait for later.

6/30/21, 11:00 a.m. – D: ok thanks Maria

6/30/21, 12:03 p.m. – Maria: Hi Daniel, another good news, Dr. Leonardo is a friend of Carlos and mine. He is treating your mother and he called me now to inform me that she has not deteriorated or worsened. Her condition is moderate to severe. Risk factor obesity He speaks English and is talking to her right now to reassure her. He suggests not transferring to Cima because it is a high risk

6/30/21, 12:04 p.m. – Maria: But we have a friend with your mom who is Dr. Leonardo.

6/30/21, 12:06 p.m. – D: Ok, this is good news thanks Maria.

6/30/21, 12:08 p.m. – Maria: Dr LEONARDO’s phone #XXXXXXX You can call him now and he speaks English

6/30/21, 12:10 p.m. – D: Thank you very much Maria

6/30/21, 2:51 p.m. – Maria: Were you able to speak with Dr?

6/30/21, 2:56 p.m. – D: Yes, I spoke with the doctor. My mother will stay in The Hospital for treatment.

Daniel’s notes: Hospital arranges video calls through hospital social worker. Mom seems ok, She complains about the quality of care. She wants transfer to CIMA. I work with lawyer to see what is possible. We decide no transfer due to Mom’s state and risk of moving. I speak with doctors for first time in English. They explain treatment options. I express No Intubation at all.

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6/30/21, 10:52 a.m. – D: Good morning SB, I was hoping to provide an update to you on my mothers situation. When is a good time to talk today?

6/30/21, 11:00 a.m. – Lawyer SB: Hi Daniel!, I am on a call right now, can I call you in about an hour?

6/30/21, 11:00 a.m. – D: Yes, that is great SB Thank you.

The Hospital: Day Four

Thursday, July 1

I felt distraught for a while on this day because I realized I was in something that could be very dangerous. I cried into the bedsheets. All I wanted was to get well, but there was noise, weird people, auditory hallucinations, unfair treatment, and a lack of communication with my friends and family. I had absolutely nothing to do but sit in bed while all around me, people were chatting on their phones and playing games on apps.

Many changes occurred on this day.

Zappo was transferred from the room, and we got a new patient Pedro in bed No.99. My friend Leo was moved to the research project. An older woman named Felicity was transferred to bed No.97. Her bed was slightly turned away from mine, and she was only in this room for two days, so I never really got to talk with her.

There are two nurses that I describe as evil twins. One wears goggles and a mask under the face shield, and she makes it plain that she does not like me. She tries to take my water from my tray. She asked about my memory project on my wrist and tried to take it! The other nurse acts very disgusted about having to change the bed sheets. These two clean up during the day and early evening, so I only have to tolerate them twice a day.

I spoke to Daniel through WhatsApp on Rosita’s phone at 6:00 p.m., told him I would be strong, and showed him my memory project. The nurses always stand next to me when I talk on the tablet or Rosita’s phone, so I have to speak to Daniel in code to convey to him that there is something seriously wrong here in the hospital. On this call, I went into greater detail about the story One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. I told him that I was the Indian.

On this night, I ¨glitched¨ but woke up and kept myself cool with a wet paper towel. I saw the sequence starting again but decided to try and sleep. Before I fell asleep, I noticed that people in the hallway outside the room were walking back and forth. It was late, yet I saw people acting like they were having a party. I could even hear people laughing and joking like at a party. I wondered what people were doing acting this way at night in a hospital with critically ill people. I was able to stay out of any program and sleep the rest of the night.

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1/7/21, 2:08 p.m. – Maria: Hi Daniel, how are you? Dr. Rico called me. Your mother continues the same with saturation of 90 -92-95, which is very serious. But since she did not allow herself to take the medications until Tuesday. She’s been on steroids for 3 days and maybe tomorrow she’ll see better results. She told me that you and your mom don’t agree to the tubing. I clarify that this procedure is done with anesthesia or is asleep and she does not feel anything. Too bad she was too late to the hospital. Let us pray to God that everything goes well.

7/1/21, 2:12 p.m. – D: Ok, thanks for this information. The doctor was clever to call me. I have called all day and I have not reached anyone.

1/7/21, 2:15 p.m. – Maria: She called me to explain to you why she doesn’t speak English.

7/1/21, 2:16 p.m. – D: I understand, thank you.

1/7/21, 2:17 p.m. – Maria: She called me from #XXXXXXX Call to see if you can understand her.

7/1/21, 2:18 p.m. – D: Good thanks.

1/7/21, 2:19 PM – Maria: Dr. Leonardo’s # if he speaks English #XXXXXXXX.

7/1/21, 2:24 p.m. – D: The difficulty is that I call and speak to the nurse and she tells me to call tomorrow afternoon. So for now, I can’t speak to a doctor. Dr. Leonardo doesn’t answer the phone.

1/7/21, 2:25 p.m. – Maria: Call those numbers I gave you.

7/1/21, 2:27 p.m. – D: Yes, I called all the phone numbers. I have them saved. I spoke to Rosita only today and she couldn’t allow my mother to speak for some reason.

1/7/21, 2:28 p.m. – Maria: I called Rosita and she gave her the messages.

1/7/21, 2:30 p.m. – D: Ok, thank you very much Maria.

1/7/21, 6:13 p.m. – Maria: How are you feeling?

1/7/21, 6:19 p.m. – Maria: What you are living is very difficult, it is a pity that Debra is not there to accompany you. No one is to blame for what happens to Renee, only she who did not want to be vaccinated and go to the hospital first and also the following Monday, Sunday, she did not allow herself to put the medications. Her obesity is a major risk factor. This is the truth, I don’t want anything bad to happen. I am praying and we have a chain of people praying for her.

7/1/21, 6:22 p.m. – D: Ok, thanks for your support Maria.

1/7/21, 6:23 p.m. – Maria: How are you feeling?

1/7/21, 6:25 p.m. – Maria: You already ate. Of the pills that Enrique went to buy, do you still have anything left?

7/1/21, 6:26 p.m. – D: I feel good. All medicine is gone. I don’t feel bad anymore. I have no fever or cough.

1/7/21, 6:42 p.m. – Maria: So it happened to you. However, you should not go out on the street for 2 weeks to avoid infecting anyone. Ideally, you do the test for more assurance.

7/1/21, 6:49 p.m. – D: Yes, I understand. I can’t leave the house until July 12.

1/7/21, 6:51 p.m. – Maria: If you need something, tell me and we will buy it for you. We are family.

7/1/21, 6:52 p.m. – D: Ok, thank you very much Maria.

7/1/21, 7:56 p.m. – Maria: Daniel forgive me for insisting but if they need tubing as a last resort it should be done and not let her die. They sedate them. Renee does not realize it or suffer it. 1/7/21, 8:00 p.m. – D: Thanks for your recommendation, Maria. We will pray that I do not have to make that decision and that my mother recovers in time.

1/7/21, 8:01 p.m. – Maria: Yes, but you have to talk to her to convince her.

1/7/21, 8:11 p.m. – D: Maria, I need to explain this to you in the most respectful way possible. My mother and I have talked about many things about her health and actions to take. My mother has explicitly instructed me never to allow the incubation tube no matter the circumstances. Therefore, I respectfully ask you not to discuss this further. I also respectfully ask that you no longer speak to a doctor about this. I’ve talked to the doctor and the incubation tube will never happen. Please respect my mother’s wishes and don’t continue to worry about this. We need to stay positive and objective. Worrying about the incubation tube and convincing my mother is not the help and support she needs right now. I hope to communicate my intention well with this message. I won’t talk about this incubation tube anymore. Out of respect for Renee, don’t mention it anymore. I really appreciate everything you have done for me and Renee and I hope you are not offended by my request.

1/7/21, 8:14 p.m. – Maria: Perfect Daniel, I won’t bother you anymore. Apologies. Let us pray that everything is for the best. It is respected.

1/7/21, 8:18 p.m. – D: Ok, thank you very much again, Maria. We will continue to pray for Renee.

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Lawyer SB: 7/1/21, 6:16 p.m. – D: Hello SB, how are you? I have yet to receive the POA from you. My mother’s situation is not good, and I need your legal and translation assistance with the hospital. I fear without your help, the worst will happen. I don’t want to stress you with this urgent need but I have no choice. Please feel free to call or text me. Thank you for your time.

7/1/21, 6:39 p.m. – Lawyer SB: Hi Daniel, sorry, I was out most of the day today. I will get in touch with them tomorrow

7/1/21, 6:40 p.m. – Lawyer SB: I will find out if there is any possibility for them to let us sign the POA somehow.

7/1/21, 6:48 p.m. – D: Great, we need to. I spoke with my mother tonight and she sounded scared. She is not happy with treatment procedures. Once we have the POA signed, I will need your contact with the doctor at least once a day. Today, I called all the numbers I have and I couldn’t speak to a doctor. This is a very bad situation my friend. Thank you for your help and I will talk to you tomorrow.